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Mallory Ortberg quotes and sayings

November 28, 1986
Mallory Ortberg motivational quote : There's simply no way you can tell a woman you work with that you disapprove of her relationship with her adult child, no matter how much you think it would be better for him to move out.
Mallory Ortberg motivational quote : There are few things more disconcerting than realizing the first date you thought went so well was in fact a dud.
Mallory Ortberg motivational quote : One of the glorious things about being a person in the world is that you don't have to worry about whether or not someone else is trying to be creepy.
Mallory Ortberg motivational quote : You need to be able to express your resentment and sense of loss in a way that doesn't damage your partner.
Mallory Ortberg motivational quote : You have a right to be treated professionally at work, and it's your supervisor's job to make sure all their employees can perform their duties comfortably and safely.
Mallory Ortberg motivational quote : Some people give gifts in order to bewilder, confuse, and manipulate their recipients.
Mallory Ortberg motivational quote : I'm of the belief that dating "potential" is almost always an exercise in frustration.
Mallory Ortberg motivational quote : An adult woman should not be so possessive of her own birthday that she begrudges her friends the chance to get married on the same day.
Mallory Ortberg motivational quote : Anyone who wants to pretend that your Huntington's disease is an invention is someone who does not have your best interests at heart.
Mallory Ortberg motivational quote : To stop challenging someone from using anti-gay language simply because they persist in using anti-gay language strikes me as a defeatist approach.
Mallory Ortberg motivational quote : There has to be some kind of personal hygiene bar that a person needs to clear in order for a relationship to be successful.
Mallory Ortberg motivational quote : You have a wonderful opportunity here to not care about something that doesn't matter to you. Please don't miss out on it.